It's making me late!

Ok. So today's the day I dedicated to cleaning my house and packing my suitcase. So far I have: gone outside and taken photos of the BEAUTIFUL autumn day, gone to breakfast with a friend, worked on my iPod speakers (no, they still don't work), called Mrs. Butterfield and left a message (just sayin' "hi"). The enchantment of the day just won't go away and it's making me late! I am just not getting anything productive done. Deep sigh! That's okay. Life is about the choices we make and Tchaikovsky's Sleeping Beauty on this beautiful day sets my pace. The men are on the roof looking for the leak, pouring water ($$$$$) to try to find out, Tommy Cat and Tessie Cat are running in and out and in and out. I fell in love with my friend's filtering of a photograph I had taken, selling me out on a program now that I absolutely have to be able to afford. All I need is St. Elmo's Fire (instrumental) and Neil Young's Harvest Moon, and well, gee, maybe I can get around to looking at my empty suitcase. Maybe.

sidewalks

I just had to walk barefoot on the old slate and bluestone sidewalks today on the walk back home. It just felt so good under the feet.

Meeting up with Milo

What a joy to see my children--Dan, Joey and little Milo. My mother always says, "your children are precious, your grandchildren more." I say it's pretty even. All of my children are my favorite. It was wonderful to be with Milo, though, and to get to know this little person. One of the most touching moments of the day was when he very gently reached out to touch the puppy. And that smile....contagious!

The Week

If I can make it through this week, I can make it. I just need to survive the stress and the blows that come with that stress, then I will be fine. Grampa and Gramma are coming. No matter how old you really are, you are somebody's child and I don't care what anybody else says, we all need our parents. We need their umbrella of love. If we don't have that, there can be a lack of completeness to our lives.

My friend Ruth just called and sang Happy Birthday to me. I did have to tell her she was a whole month (exactly to the day) early, but it did my spirit good to hear her voice and know that she was thinking of me, with my best interests at heart. And an invitation to get away and come up as she will be there through the end of next month. How long does it take to get to Maine from here....?

Spring!

The sun is finally getting back it's "punch." The warmth of April afternoons sitting outside with my grandpuppy can be so rewarding, just watching the little flowers in the breeze, while puppy rubs himself through the still uncut grass.

Sometimes I wonder who I am, more often I wonder what I am

I feel lost and alone. Then I re-read the
The Ten Axioms of Choice Theory
The only person whose behavior we can control is our own.
All we can give another person is information.
All long-lasting psychological problems are relationship problems.
The problem relationship is always part of our present life.
What happened in the past has everything to do with what we are today, but we can only satisfy our basic needs right now and plan to continue satisfying them in the future.
We can only satisfy our needs by satisfying the pictures in our Quality World.
All we do is behave.
All behavior is Total Behavior and is made up of four components: acting, thinking, feeling and physiology.
All Total Behavior is chosen, but we only have direct control over the acting and thinking components. We can only control our feeling and physiology indirectly through how we choose to act and think.
All Total Behavior is designated by verbs and named by the part that is the most recognizable

Hoarding

I have become a hoarder! My drawers are a magpie's nest filled with random sized rubber bands, pens, tacks, paper clips of various sizes and colors. I look at a piece of string and consider the possibilities that exist if I should need it. As I clean out the drawers on this dead Saturday (gasp! only late morning!), I wonder if I'll really toss it all, or throw it in a box for the barn. Both have their temptations. After all, 30 years from now someone could be sorting through all that "stuff" in the old lady's barn (yes, I plan to live there for my duration) and they may really need it. (Who am I kidding?) Okay, okay! I'm tossing it all..oh wait...except for the old business cards--I can use the other side for grocery lists....the green beads--St. Patricks Day is almost here...

Anger

It's okay to be angry as long as your anger results in a change in you that offers you better choices, choices for growth. Alot of anger occurs when people do not meet my expectations of what my quality world should look like. I cannot change who they are, but I can change myself, my expectations of them need to change, and I need to look further than them to satisfy my needs, wants and desires. Pull up your big girl/big boy panties and grow up. Whew.

Winter

The sky was a perfect shade of gray today at 9 a.m. As I walked my dog I could see that perfect shade highlight the freshly fallen snow. You could duplicate it in photoshop, but rarely do you see that firsthand. No, I didn't take any pictures.